Back in March, one of my good friends sent me a message asking me, “is this you?” and included a link to a website. Worried about the possibility that nude photos of me had somehow ended up on the Internet—which could tarnish my reputation and threaten my nonexistent Xangalebrity status that only exists in my imagination—I clicked on the link and saw this:
Yes, that is my face—but it’s on someone else’s MySpace page! Someone named Rose! And since I am pretty sure I was not separated at birth from a slutty twin sister, Rose is a complete stranger who is using my picture as her own. In fact, all of Rose’s pictures are of me—and were taken directly from my Xanga site!
I know I am writing about this in May even though my friend had written to me back in March, but that’s because I couldn’t think about this MySpace page without becoming extremely pissed off. And when I am pissed off, I can’t write. My friends did try to placate my pissiness by telling me to look at the situation as a positive rather than a negative one. Having my photos used for someone else’s profile could be a sign that I have achieved a certain level of hotness. After all, no one steals pictures of ugly people—what’s the point of doing that when the person stealing it is usually ugly? He should just use his own picture, right?
And Rose has to be, like, the fugliest person on Earth. She couldn’t even use what I call the Hotness-By-Cropping technique. Hotness-By-Cropping is done when someone puts up a cropped picture of one of her body parts—e.g., her eyes, lips, abs, etc.—instead of posting a photo of her whole face. Some people do this as a way of maintaining anonymity, but come on now: that’s not the first thing that comes to anyone’s mind when he or she sees a Hotness-By-Cropping profile picture. We’re actually thinking, “This person must think her face is fugly.” And if you think you’re a fug, then you must be.
So this Rose person, being such a hot mess she couldn’t even use Hotness-By-Cropping, was complimenting me by stealing my photos and using them as her own on her MySpace profile. Whew! I feel so much better!
NOT! I’m nowhere close to feeling even remotely better because that isn’t enough of a “bright side” to outshine my pissed-offness. I don’t care that my pictures were misappropriated; my problem is that my face is associated with a profile created by a dumbass!
I mean, look at this sh*t!
People are going to look at my picture and think, “Damn, she can’t even spell “girls” correctly! That’s probably because her highest level of education is ‘some college’.” Noooo!
And the whole thing about “I’ll meet any freaks out there who wanna talk nasty” and “tell me everything you want me to do to you or that you want to do to me”—look at the guys who responded to this b*tch:
*Barf!*
absolutangel64 
Damn, I would be pretty pissed off too. I might feel flattered slightly for maybe a few seconds, but then I would try my best to get that crap taken down. Can’t be associated with bad grammar! haha
Omg that is so low.
That is freaky. She obviously thinks you’re too pretty and that she isn’t. lol! >.> I hope you reported her.
Oh that’s not cool at all!
you DO realize that your pictures were jacked by either:a.) ethiopian money scam folksb.) webcam site trying to get more views through myspace profilesc.) eastern european hackers attempting to get myspace accounts and email addresses for their spam listsMost likely, this is not an actual person.
Wow..that’s just freaky and disturbing. If I were in that situation, I wouldn’t be amused either. The commentary, on the other hand, was hilarious though.
wow that is horrible. I would contact myspace to try to get the page removed. But knowing them they probably won’t do anything. I wish there was some kind of photo lock on personal pictures, so that someone couldn’t steal anyone else’s pics.
I promise not to use your picture without your permission unless it’s an emergency.
@Chinkzilla – haha whered you come up with ‘ethiopian money scam folks’. its a rockin idea though:Ddamn ethiopians:D
ohmygoodness…I cannot imagine your level of pissed…as self proclaimed Judge Xanga, I say that you have permission to virtually b*tch slap her! Danggg – that’s something that you hear about happening on the Tyra show with cyber bullies or something insane. – “This girl in my class made up a profile of me looking skanky on myspace and used my profile picture…then she added all my friends!” Wow…I’m sorry.
This is why I use Facebook!PEOPLE NEVER MAKE FAKE PROFILES ON FACEBOOK.Excuse me though, I have to go answer my friend requests from Miley Cyrus, Mr. T., and The Incredible Hulk.THEY ARE TOTALLY GOING IN MY TOP FRIENDS.
sofa king douchie!
hahhaha too bad for you ehh? Well luckily for guys we dont go through these things.
LMAO…sorry I totally feel your pain but this is effing hilarious. Can you please post rose’s myspace address? Searching for ‘rose dirty girl myspace’ gave me weird results…
Haha that’s hilarious. I love reading your posts :)That does suck though, I’m pretty sure stealing someone elses identity is illegal though. I bet no-one would ever personate me though.
@Chinkzilla – What is worse is that there is a good chance a guy did this hoping to meet women, ha. I have seen that type of fake profile, clearly hoping to lure in lesbian girls. I am surprised no one has mentioned that possibility yet. I got fooled once by that type of profile, years ago (guy pretending to be a girl, I thought it was a girl and almost messed up big time, thankfully realized just in time).
They have a way to report that one myspace I hope you know. A specific way for people stealing your pictures.
I was going to use your pic for my profile but I couldn’t get it to look right…
Hahaha…wow…that’s pretty messed up.The people who make those things up need a serious beat down that’ll engrave upon them a good reminder as to why they shouldn’t ever do that again.