So I got some Biotene for my dad the other day because he’s on medication that causes dry mouth, and a brilliant idea popped into head as I was checking out: “Hey, I should totally try rinsing my mouth out with this even though I don’t have dry mouth because why not?” Completely logical thing to do, right?

So I tried it and I have to say…maybe the sensation would be different if I actually had a legitimate reason to use the stuff, but when I was swishing it around in my mouth, it felt like I had a mouthful of sweet saliva all up in my primary face hole. Seriously, the consistency of Biotene is similar to human saliva, and it’s really weird having it in your mouth because you know it’s not your saliva. So the whole time I was going, “OMG, it’s like I’ve got a lot of someone else’s saliva in my mouth…!”