I was at the mall yesterday, wandering around aimlessly and minding my own business, when I noticed this weird girl following me. At first I assumed she was just a typical female shopper when I saw her at both Sanrio and Victoria’s Secret—but just to make sure, I decided to test her by going into that store that sells those “Warhammer” or whatever-the-hell-they’re-called pieces, and is only patronized by boys with bad eyesight.

And guess what? She followed me in. Girl + No Glasses = Confirmation that she was a weirdo with terrible ninja skills. And she knew she had been exposed, which was probably why she started talking to me.

WEIRD GIRL: Hey, umm…I know this is really weird but…do you happen to have a blog?

ME: I’m not into girls—wait, what? I mean, yes, I do have a blog.

WEIRD GIRL: On Xanga?

ME: Yes.

WEIRD GIRL: Oh! I knew you looked familiar! I read your blog all the time! It’s great!

I suddenly felt like such an ass. She wasn’t a creepy stalker! She was just a fan who had been chasing me through the mall! Me! She recognized me! From my blog! I had just been recognized!

This whole thing made me flashback to my Xangalebrity post: could it actually be coming true? Was this the reason why I stepped in the pile of poop one of my cats had strategically laid by the bathroom so that I would get doodoo feet when I was taking a midnight piss? (Cat poop, dog poop, they are basically the same.)

ME: …Really?

WEIRD GIRL: Yeah! You’re [person whose username is not Absolutangel64], right?

Have you ever had a WTF moment where you wanted to kick someone’s face in, but you couldn’t decide if it should be yours or the other person’s? Well this was my moment.

By the way: I looked this Xangan up when I got home. Weird Girl got me confused with another Asian blogger—who looks nothing like me, but I wouldn’t call her ugly because I was mistaken for her, and therefore to call her ugly would mean I am calling myself ugly. And I am not going to do that!

ME: Umm…

WEIRD GIRL: I love all the homeopathic remedies you suggest. I actually tried Mercurius Vivus the other day. It really helped.

ME: I’m sorry?

WEIRD GIRL: Oh, you know…*whispers* it’s for pee that burns and kind of hurts.

Here is my question: what do you think I should have done at this point? I’ll tell you what happened, but I’m just curious because I think my response was kind of bland and lame.